From Habits to Formation
Adopting small habits to support long-term growth
I have a new morning ritual that has changed my life: I take our dog Callie out for a 20 minute walk around the lake near our house and we just enjoy the natural beauty of Golden Gate Park. It’s not exactly a revolutionary thing I’m doing, but it’s become profound for me.
Why? I’m so glad you asked! Well mostly because it’s not just a habit or routine. Habits and routines are established behaviors that are easy to repeat because we’ve done them over and over. They are mostly functional in nature and pretty straightforward: brush your teeth, make coffee, take a shower...all routine things that I do day in and day out. They each have a function and are good at meeting those goals. A ritual, however, has meaning beyond the action itself. It has a depth and quality to it that goes past the direct results and it shapes your character in simple yet meaningful ways.
For me, these walks do a few key things in addition to the immediate benefits of being outside and active. First, my senses are hit with a jump start--the fresh air, the chirping birds, the early rays of the sun...it’s a party for the senses and my brain which opens up mental pathways that were pretty sleepy beforehand. Second, I get space to reflect, to plan and to dream without pressure, deadlines or feedback; it’s just for me. Last, I get to wonder. As an Enneagram 5, I love to observe. These walks abound with opportunity for me to be curious and it sets the tone for me to carry that posture throughout my day. These three things make me a much more joyful and grounded person, and I’m so grateful I can have this time each day. What started as a practical task became a habit, then was infused with deep personal meaning to become a ritual.
I do recognize that a 20 minute morning walk each day in beautiful Golden Gate Park is a privilege. Not everyone has that time or the proximity to such a gorgeous space. However, my hope here is not to say that each of you needs to replicate my morning ritual. No, find what works for you: make a small yet meaningful change that creates enough of a new wrinkle in your day to open up opportunities and perspectives that weren’t there before and commit to it. Start it as a simple habit that you can easily repeat. Over time, see if it can become a ritual that begins to form you in ways that seemed impossible before.
A few questions to consider as you explore a new habit:
What’s possible?
Every ritual must be built through repetition, so it first must be a habit and habits have to be achievable on a consistent basis. Don’t swing for the fences with these. That will come later. First, find a healthy action you want to become a regular part of your days, then take one small step to commit to and do it! More on habits in a future blog post because there’s some great stuff out there these days.
When can I do it?
Most of us have fairly packed days. Adding another to do could feel overwhelming. However, if you find the right slot in your day, having a ritual adds life, energy and goodness to your day can increase productivity, reduce stress and bring joy.
What am I wanting?
I think every ritual should add some level of awareness: what are you accomplishing today? How does your body feel? What is weighing on you? Who do you feel connected to? Who do you want to reach out to? But, maybe you want something more. Perhaps it’s space to grieve a loss or disappointment, to exercise, to deepen a relationship, to explore your identity or increase your confidence.
Whatever you are wanting, there’s a habit you can adopt to help you towards your goals and by simply taking a step forward, you can get there. I’d love to hear more about what each of you have been doing or are hoping to accomplish and work together to find life-giving rituals that can support the change that you desire. Comment below with your own rituals or what you are looking for, and let’s do this!
